She sat back and just felt.
Just 10 months ago, what felt like several years ago, she had been the 17 year old girl who had confidently come on the campus of Southern Adventist University. So much had changed. There were new people, new circumstances, and a new outlook. And the some of the old had come back in a beautiful undercurrent of familiarity. It was amazing how the two blended so simply and so complexly all at the same time.
The voices of the people she loved drifted in and out of her consciousness like memories flickering across her mind. There were other voices too, the voices of the people who weren’t there, whispering inside her heart. Soon, in less than a week, she would be re-united with a best friend she hadn’t seen in what felt like ages. The people in her life, oh the people. It was beautiful. Over the past year they had taught her what real, deep, pain was. They had taught her joy, deep joy. She had learned from them rejection and acceptance. She had loved, and she had loved deeply. The wounds of friendship run deep. And there were no regrets. More than that, she had learned from them more of God’s character: the times they had loved unconditionally, the times they had been patient, the times they had gently led her back to His feet.
As the wind brushed her hair across her face, she realized just how much had changed. The insecurities of youth had drifted away and been replaced by the trust of womanhood. The pain had shaped her into a much deeper feeler, the joy had opened her soul. The triumphs had given her courage to face the unknown with a known God and the failures had taught her perseverance.
The spiritual struggles had been great, but the triumphs much greater. She had not walked with God, she had raced, crawled, and been carried by Him. She had wrestled and she had prevailed. He had held her and He had taught her. In the moments when everything was black, He had shown her light. He had led in more amazing ways than her wildest dreams could have ever imagined. She had fallen in love with His greatness and had lost herself in His love. She chuckled. The time of doubt was behind her. She knew not what the future would be, only Who would be in her future.
She looked up and smiled. It was time. Time to move forward with God and with the dreams He had planted in her heart. Time to move forward with the blessings He had placed in her life. It was time. She took up the guitar and began to play. Everything had changed. Nothing had changed.
“I have decided to follow Jesus, no turning back, no turning back.”
“Onward, ever onward.”
It has been a blessing sharing part of my life with you all. I really wish there were a way for me to keep blogging, but alas, it can’t be! I hope you’ll continue on with your spiritual journeys and keep your eyes on Jesus! Lo, He comes quickly!
Fica forte en Deus!