Annie—One last time
Here it is: my very last blog post as a Freshman for SAU. This post is bittersweet to write for me. On the one hand, I am sad to bring this experience to a close, but on the other I am so excited for the road ahead. I can’t wait to see what happens next in terms of my life and the path ahead of me.
In my previous entry, I broke it to you guys about my decision to leave SAU. Now, I could sit here and write and rant about all the flaws I see at SAU, but I don’t want that to be how I leave my last entry. SAU is an incredible place with incredible people. I have made friendships here and relationships with certain professors which I’m sure will last when I leave this place. My issues are not with the physical campus, but rather the restrictions put on me and my peers. I am a young adult. I am growing and learning and changing all the time. This is the point in my life when I have to figure out who I am, and I just don’t feel like I’m fully allowed to explore life and the world here. To be honest, I feel like I have been disconnected from the world. Some people crave to fall off the map and not know what’s happening, but I crave information; I want to know about the biggest thing in the news the minute it is released to the public. I want to go hiking and camping and see beautiful places and not have to worry about getting back in time for curfew. I left my parent’s house equip with the tools to be able to be a responsible, mature, young adult, but I feel like I’m not really allowed to use those tools here. As I said, this is not a bash against the school or campus; it is simply me saying that while this campus can fit what many people need, it does not fit what I need, and that’s okay! Everybody is different, and everybody fits somewhere. I’m sad my place isn’t here, but I know I will find my place, and this just means I’m one step closer to getting there!
The events which have taken place in my life during my time at SAU will forever be etched in my brain as some of my least and most favorite memories. I’ve had laughs here. I’ve experienced heartbreak here. I’ve been surprised here. I’ve had tears here. I have spent my entire paycheck on taco bell and Starbucks and Panera Bread SEVERAL TIMES here. My time here has been far from perfect, but I wouldn’t trade it for the world because, like everything else that has happened in my 19 years on Earth, my time here has helped mold me into who I want to be as I enter the next phase of my life.
The next phase of my life is filled with possibilities and potential. I am excited to start this journey, as I know it will mean becoming one step closer to the best version of me that I can possibly be. I am blessed to have been raised in a state that offers great colleges as well as awesome financial aid opportunities to students who maintain a certain GPA. Lucky for me, I fit the criteria, which means I get to benefit from the funding without having to let my quality of education suffer. Plus, I’m closer to home and only a few hours away from SAU, so I can make visits to see my friends sometimes. Overall, it’s a win-win.
I don’t know if any potential students read this blog, but if you are a student considering SAU, and you read the Freshman Blogs religiously every week like I did before I came here, I ask you to take this entry with a grain of salt; this is my personal experience. It does not mean this school isn’t a great place or fit for you, and it doesn’t mean you won’t be happy here. It simply means it wasn’t a fit for me, and that’s okay. Don’t let my experiences stop you from having your own. If SAU is your dream, then by all means, apply to the school. If you get accepted, which you probably will, then come! Try this place out for yourself. You can’t decide how you’ll feel about a place until you actually experience it.
It has been my honor and privilege to be a Freshman Blogger. This was one of my dreams when I decided to come to SAU. I have always had a mind for writing, and I prayed that I would be able to continue to use a talent I was blessed with. When I first saw that SAU had a blogging opportunity for students, before I was even eligible to apply to the school because I wasn’t old enough, I would read the Freshman Blogs, and I remember thinking to myself, “I’m going to do everything in my power to be one of those when I get to SAU.” And now, here I am, finishing my LAST entry as a Freshman Blogger. I remember sending in my essay to be considered, saying a prayer over it, hoping to get the job, but wondering if I would. When I got the email saying I had been chosen, I was shocked. I also had absolutely no idea what this year would bring, and how I would be grow and change over the course of my weekly blogs. I look back over my entries sometimes, and I can see a slow progression. To the naked eye, the change is probably not obvious, but coming from the person who wrote the entries, I can see it, and it is amazing to have this part of my life completely documented. I always journaled as a kid, and this has made me pick back up my love for it.
Also, I’m hoping to start my own blog after this entry has come and gone. My blog this year has started an addiction; I just can’t stay away from writing! I hear they are fairly easy to set up, so if you loved reading my entries and want to keep up with me, be on the lookout for my own personal blog!
I want to close the entry with some thank-you’s. Thank you to my editors, the lovely people who read my blog and post it for me. Thank you for the opportunity you gave me this year; it is truly an experience I will not forget. Thank you to my other freshman bloggers for writing throughout the year, even when we didn’t want to or didn’t know what to say. You never know! Your blog could have made a huge difference in someone’s life this year! Lastly, I want to say thank you to my family, especially my parents, for always helping pick me up when I fell on my face throughout this last year, and for always encouraging me and inspiring some of my most emotional entries this year. Without you, I couldn’t have done all of this with the passion I had.
There is never an easy way to end a blog post, especially when it’s your last one. Usually I end my post with a “until next week”, but for this one I can’t end it that way. However, I have to think of something, right? Okay, here it goes:
Thank you for giving me an incredible year of writing. I hope my entries inspired you as much they inspired me through writing them. Always remember that you are loved, cherished, and you matter to people in this world, and never take that for granted. Live life to the fullest, and never regret what you may learn from a mistake. Guys, this is it. This is the end. To all my fellow freshman: Congratulations everybody! We made it!
All my love,